Never Alone

Studying is a lonely pursuit.

The first semester classes of medical school lent themselves well to group studying, which was a real blessing.  We had a lot of fun with our study group, and it made the mountains of anatomy and histology packets bearable.  The rest of med school, though, was better suited for solo study... just sitting down alone to read and learn.  Aaron and I would occasionally study together, but it was mostly just quizzing each other a bit before tests.  The past couple weeks, Aaron and I have been doing a lot of our board studying together, and that's been a really nice change of pace.

It's hard to imagine how different and much more difficult medical school would be without Aaron.  Having a spouse in medical school can certainly make plenty of things more challenging - during weeks with lots of exams, the dishes and laundry build up and dinner ends up being something like frozen pizza or Tuna Helper.  However, the benefits far outweigh the challenges.  The top positive is that we got to spend the last two years together, almost every hour of every day.  There is no person on earth I'd rather spend time with than Aaron.  We love to be together, so it's been such a blessing to get to have the same schedule for the first two years of our marriage.  It's also so nice to have a spouse who really understands what I've been going through, since he is going through it too.  Medical school is often hard for people to understand who haven't experienced it.  It's nice to know also that neither of us feels neglected when a particular weekend ends up being really quiet, since we're both studying really hard; I'm sure that can be a challenge for some students whose spouses aren't in medical school. 

All that being said, even with a spouse who is in the same year of medical school, studying still tends to be lonely.  We have plenty of relationships we really enjoy, but often don't have the time to spend with friends and family that we wish we did. It can be isolating to spend so much time alone studying every day.  At a time in our lives when most of our peers work 9 to 5 jobs and have evenings and weekends to hang out and build friendships, it can be sad and frustrating to have so little time to join them.  I think having so little free time can be especially lonely in the age of communication.  Not only do medical students not have as much time to hang out with friends, there are constant reminders online of the much more active social lives of non-medical school friends.   Though the next couple years of school will have new challenges, it will be really nice to be spending more time with people than books again! 

The last couple years have required a lot of sacrifice, especially once Julia entered the scene and made things even more challenging.  I wouldn't trade my life for anything, though.  God loves us and we love Him.  I have a beautiful family that I love with all my heart.  Aaron and I both come from loving families that add so much joy to our lives.  We are blessed to have truly wonderful friends.  And I believe that all the sacrifices we are making currently will be worth it in the end.  As hard as studying may be sometimes, I believe that God has a plan for our schooling.  Here's a link to an awesome account of the way an alumni from my medical school was able to make a big difference in the aftermath of the recent Joplin tornado.  I pray God will put all we are learning to good use someday to make a difference in the lives of others.  We feel passionate about the need for good Catholic doctors.  St. Gianna Beretta Molla, a wife, mother, physician, and a role model of mine, had this to say about the need: 

"Everyone works in the service of man. We doctors work directly on man himself... The great mystery of man is Jesus: 'He who visits a sick person, helps me,' Jesus said... Just as the priest can touch Jesus, so do we touch Jesus in the bodies of our patients... We have opportunities to do good that the priest doesn't have. Our mission is not finished when medicines are no longer of use. We must bring the soul to God; our word has some authority... Catholic doctors are so necessary!"

Everyone gets lonely sometimes; loneliness is just a part of life.  I suppose it's what we do with our loneliness that counts.  Do we use it for a catalyst to reach out and connect with others?  And, most importantly, do we use it as a catalyst to commune with Christ?  After all, we are never alone.  That's a promise.  "'And behold, I am with you always, until the end of the age'" (Matthew 28:20b).

Fisherwoman Julia

I look forward to being done with boards for many reasons.  One of the many is that it will be easier to keep up with this blog!  Aaron and I have been studying, studying, studying for boards.  We invested in an online video series to help us study, and that has been super helpful as we try to wade through everything we learned during the past two years of medical school. 

We had a nice visit with Aaron's family last week, getting lots of studying done, celebrating his dad's birthday, and, of course, taking a short fishing trip on the day with the nicest weather!  Julia is quite a cute fisherwoman.

 

The Week in Pictures

What a week this has been!

We studied for our last few finals EVER!

Toward the end, it was hard to care...

 And we became a bit crazy... (Nine finals is an awful lot!)

 

But, we finished!  And the only photo to document the occasion is this one that Aaron snapped, which seems very appropriate:

It's hard to believe that we're done with the classroom for good!  We've really enjoyed the lessons we're learned and the friends we've made the past couple of years of medical school.  This semester, we've really taken advantage of and enjoyed the flexibility the classroom has given us to stay home with Julia much of the time.  We are excited to start rotations in July, to finally begins putting into practice all we have learned.  It will also be great to not have to study as much anymore, as soon as we take boards in early June! 

In other news, Sarah was confirmed last weekend!

And during this past week, we also celebrated Mothers' Day and Julia's 5 month birthday!

Praise God for all His blessings!

Providence

After two finals today, we are done with four of our nine finals!  We're pretty tired around here.

And this is about how we feel about studying right now...

What are notes good for?  Crumpling and eating, of course!

We have been enjoying the beautiful weather, though.  Julia is her mother's daughter in that she loves being outside.  Yesterday, we spent a lot of time in the backyard, swinging on our swingset, exploring the bushes, and enjoying the squirrels and birds (including a beautiful cardinal!) who make their homes in the huge trees in our yard.  Our yard has a Secret Garden feel to it - despite having neighbors close by, the giant trees have branches covering almost the entire yard, making it feel secluded and peaceful.

"Let the heavens be glad and the earth rejoice; let the sea and what fills it resound; let the plains be joyful and all that is in them. Then let all the trees of the forest rejoice before the LORD who comes, who comes to govern the earth, To govern the world with justice and the peoples with faithfulness" (Psalm 96:11-13).

This evening after dinner, the three of us went on a walk and Julia was positively exuberant.  There's just something about being out in nature that makes one happy to be alive!

Being outside is always such a reminder to me of the providence of God.

"'Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat (or drink), or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing?  Look at the birds in the sky; they do not sow or reap, they gather nothing into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are not you more important than they?  Can any of you by worrying add a single moment to your life-span? Why are you anxious about clothes? Learn from the way the wild flowers grow. They do not work or spin. But I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was clothed like one of them. If God so clothes the grass of the field, which grows today and is thrown into the oven tomorrow, will he not much more provide for you, O you of little faith?'" (Matthew 6:25-30)

God feeds the birds and clothes the flowers and grass of the field - how much more does He care for us!  During these crazy times of finals, I am very aware that God is faithful and He is taking care of us.  We may be sleep deprived, but we're all fed, clothed, and happy.  We haven't even been able to make through all the material for some of our finals, and yet they've been going really well.  As my confirmation saint, and Julia's patron saint, Saint Julie Billiart, often said, "How good is the good God!"  Thank you, Father, for Your providence!